On Second Thought

Sometimes when you try to add a little laughter into an otherwise dull day, not everyone thinks it’s funny.

This is the story of my life.

Last week, my sweet husband Bobby went to the grocery store for us. He made a list and handed it to me to see if I wanted to add anything.

Unfortunately for him, I wanted to add some things.

In full disclusure, I have been told I possess the handwriting of a doctor whose side hobby is a serial killing So, when he handed me the grocery list to add my needs and wants, I kindly printed, s-l-o-w-l-y, because I really wanted my Oreo Thins.

As an afterthought, I decided to add “medium pony” at the end, thinking it would make him smile at his somewhat goofy wife.

By the time he got home, I had already forgotten that shenanigan and was planning my next. The hint that my plot to add some hilarity to his day had gone awry was the look on his face, followed by “A medium pony? Really? You know I can’t read your handwriting!”

To add insult to his injury, he asked three random women he had never met to decipher the word that followed “medium” because he was genuinely invested in getting me what I asked for.

“They all said it looked like ‘medium pony’ to them, but I knew that wasn’t right,” he explained, then he gave up.

I think the fact that he asked total strangers if they could read my handwriting because he wanted to make sure I got what I wanted – which was not a small or large pony, but specifically a medium one – is what tipped him over the edge.

For a brief moment, Bobby had forgotten who he had married, because I commit these intentional fouls more often than anyone knows.

It wasn’t a completely original thought, though. My son did that once to me when he was about 11 years old, and I asked him to make the grocery list while I checked the pantry to see what we were out of. What resulted was the words “a pony” in between “sugar” and “Cap’n Crunch”. I fell out laughing in the grocery store, and never forgot it. He’s a little like his mother in this regard.

Bobby, however, did not fall to his knees laughing in the grocery store or anywhere else, probably because I am not 11.

We all know I most likely will not change, but I will type my list next time.